bold-dove-0795/18/2026

Still processing what happened to us two summers ago — needed to share this somewhere

I don't really know why I'm typing this out tonight, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately and I just need to put it somewhere.

Two summers ago my partner and I were driving back from a weekend trip with our two kids — they were 7 and 9 at the time. It was a stretch of two-lane highway, nothing crazy, middle of the afternoon. Out of absolutely nowhere my partner started having what I now know was a medical episode — went completely unresponsive and slumped forward. The car drifted across the center line and we clipped a guardrail before sliding into a shallow ditch and hitting a utility pole.

I remember screaming their name and then my whole body just... switched into some other mode. I got both kids out through the back door before I even realized my left hand was wrong. Turned out I'd fractured two fingers and sprained my wrist pretty badly — I think I braced against the dash without even knowing I did it.

The kids were shaken but physically okay, thank God. My partner had to be airlifted and spent several days in the hospital — they have no memory of the crash at all. Zero. The doctors said that's normal for what they experienced but it's honestly surreal to talk to someone about the worst day of your life and have them just... not have it.

Our older kid still doesn't like highway driving. I still flinch at certain sounds.

I'm not even really here with a question. I guess I just wanted to say it out loud to people who might actually get it. Does anyone else feel like the accident never fully left your body even years later?

8 replies

Most helpful first

candid-mole-7615/18/2026
Yeah, it absolutely stays in your body. I was in a bad wreck three years ago and I still catch myself gripping the door handle on highways like I can somehow steer from the passenger seat. What you're describing — that hypervigilance, the flinching — that's real and it makes complete sense. You don't just 'get over' something like that.
mellow-kestrel-2675/18/2026
What you're describing sounds a lot like trauma responses that just never got addressed — which is incredibly common after accidents, especially when you were in 'protect everyone else' mode and your own injuries kind of got pushed to the back burner. The body keeps score, honestly. If you haven't talked to anyone — a therapist, even just a GP — it might be worth bringing up. PTSD after accidents is underdiagnosed because people feel like 'I survived, so I should be fine.' That's not how it works.
- swift-crow-7185/18/2026
  I know it probably doesn't feel like it on the hard nights, but the fact that your kids walked away, your partner recovered, and you held it together in the most terrifying possible moment — that's genuinely remarkable. Not dismissing the hard stuff at all. Just… you did something extraordinary that day.
silent-fox-7195/18/2026
I just want to say thank you for sharing this. That image of you getting your kids out while your hand was broken — you were incredible in that moment even if it doesn't feel that way. I hope you're being as gentle with yourself now as you were fierce for your family then. 💙
warm-seal-1615/18/2026
Not legal advice, but since you mentioned injuries — fractured fingers, a sprain, your partner's airlift and hospitalization — if you never pursued any kind of claim or at least documented everything at the time, it's worth knowing that there are time limits on these things that vary a lot depending on your state. If it's been two years you may still have options depending on where it happened, but that window can close. Might be worth a free consultation just to understand where you stand, even if you decide not to do anything.
- plain-stoat-0165/18/2026
  To answer your actual question: yes, it never fully leaves. But it does get quieter. The flinching becomes less frequent. Your kid will probably get more comfortable in cars over time too, especially if you don't make a big deal of it and just let them set the pace. You're clearly not someone who falls apart — you proved that already.
quick-sparrow-4985/18/2026
I hope if there was any insurance involved at any point you didn't just take whatever they first offered. Adjusters will lowball soft-tissue injuries and emotional trauma almost every single time because they know most people just want it to be over. Your wrist, your fingers, AND the psychological aftermath — that's not nothing.
daring-heron-3405/18/2026
Did you ever get any follow-up care for your hand after the initial treatment? Asking because fractured fingers that aren't properly rehabbed can cause chronic grip issues years later that people just chalk up to 'getting older.' If you've had any lingering stiffness or weakness it might actually be worth revisiting with an orthopedic specialist, even now.