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keen-kestrel-106

Hit-and-run in my own parking lot and my apartment complex is stonewalling everyone — what now?

I'm honestly at a loss and could use some perspective from people who've been through something similar.

Came out to my car two mornings ago and immediately knew something was wrong — somebody had clipped my rear quarter panel pretty good. Paint scraped off, bumper partially hanging, the whole thing. It happened overnight in the parking lot of my apartment complex.

I went to the front office and asked if they had camera footage. They confirmed yes, they caught the whole thing on their lot cameras. But then they basically shut down — said they "can't release footage to residents" and that their policy is to only deal with law enforcement requests. Fine, okay. So I filed a police report and the responding officer went back to the office with me. Same answer. They stonewalled the cop too. He was pretty frustrated, honestly.

Here's what makes it worse: I have a pretty good idea who did it. There's a vehicle in the same lot with damage that lines up almost perfectly with mine — same height, similar color transfer on the bumper edge. I told the officer and he noted it, but said without the footage or the other driver admitting it, his hands are pretty tied.

The office mentioned offhand that their system auto-deletes after about 10 days. That clock is ticking.

I don't have collision coverage right now — just liability — so I can't just run it through my own insurance easily. And even if I could, I don't want my rates going up for something I had zero control over.

I'm not made of money. This repair is going to hurt. Is there any way to force the complex to preserve or hand over that footage? Can I go after the other driver directly if I can prove it was their vehicle? Has anyone dealt with anything like this?

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9 replies

  • 16
    kind-tern-785

    I know this is more of a property/legal situation than a medical one, but I just want to say — the stress of something like this is real and it's okay to feel overwhelmed by it. Practical stuff aside, make sure you're sleeping and eating. Chronic stress genuinely affects your ability to think clearly and advocate for yourself. You're handling this proactively, which is the right instinct. Just don't run yourself into the ground over it.

  • 8
    curious-otter-127

    Ugh this is so infuriating to read. You did everything right — you checked the cameras, you filed the report, you even found what looks like the culprit's car — and you're still getting the runaround. I really hope the footage situation gets resolved before it deletes. Rooting for you, please keep us updated.

  • 10
    keen-marten-210

    The footage preservation issue is the most urgent thing here. Your complex may be sitting on evidence, and if they let it auto-delete after you've already put them on notice that it's relevant to a potential claim, that could actually work in your favor legally — it's called spoliation of evidence. Send them a written request (email is fine, but certified mail is better) explicitly asking them to preserve all footage from that night. Keep a copy. The moment you've done that in writing, you've created a record that they knew it mattered.

  • 10
    cool-seal-590

    Even if you track down the other driver and file against their liability insurance, don't expect a smooth ride. Their insurer is going to look for any reason to lowball or deny. Get your own repair estimates in writing from two or three shops before you talk numbers with anyone. And don't give a recorded statement to their adjuster without knowing your rights first — you're not required to.

  • 9
    swift-otter-984

    Worked in auto claims for years. Here's the reality: if you can establish the other vehicle caused the damage — even circumstantially — you can file a third-party claim against their insurance directly. You don't need your own collision coverage for that. The challenge is proving it without the footage. The matching damage and paint transfer you described are actually meaningful evidence though. Document it yourself right now — take detailed photos of both vehicles from multiple angles, today, before anything changes.

    • 8
      kind-crane-494

      Three things, in order: 1) Send that written preservation notice to the complex TODAY. 2) Photograph everything — your car, the other car, the spot, the lot layout. 3) Ask the officer if there's any way to subpoena the footage through the report you already filed. The written paper trail matters more than you think right now.

  • 5
    warm-beaver-393

    I don't want to be harsh but I'm curious — did the officer actually document the matching vehicle in the report, or just sort of acknowledge it verbally? Because there's a big difference. If it's not in the report, it's going to be a lot harder to point to later. Also, do you know who owns that vehicle — like, is it a neighbor you recognize or a total stranger?

  • 10
    silent-raven-296

    Not legal advice, but a couple of things worth knowing: in most states, a property owner or manager who controls evidence relevant to a legal dispute can face consequences for destroying it after receiving notice. The written preservation request others mentioned is genuinely important. Also, if you can identify the other vehicle's owner through the plate, you may have a direct civil claim against them regardless of what their insurer does. A free consult with a PI attorney wouldn't hurt — many take property damage cases on contingency depending on the circumstances.

  • 5
    clear-sparrow-745

    Almost exact same situation happened to me in a condo complex last year. The "we can't show residents footage" line is so common it should be a cliché at this point. What actually moved things for me was getting a letter from an attorney — not even filing anything, just a letter. The management company suddenly got a lot more cooperative about preservation. Might be worth a free consultation just to get that letter sent.