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bright-finch-713

Parking lot fender bender, other driver refused to give me her info — what now?

This happened a few days ago and I'm still kind of spiraling about it so bear with me.

I was cutting through a shopping center lot — you know the kind, chaotic with cars going every direction — and I was moving from one of the side aisles into the main through-lane. A woman was already coming down that lane and we clipped each other. My front end got the worst of it; she just had some scraping along her rear quarter panel.

I knew the situation wasn't great for me since I was the one merging, so I didn't say much when we were talking. We called the police, and the officer told us he couldn't do an official report since it was private property. He just suggested we trade insurance info and move on.

Here's where it gets stressful: I handed over my card when she asked. When I asked for hers, she straight-up said no — basically told me I was at fault so I didn't need it. The officer kind of just... let that go? I was flustered and didn't push back, which I regret so much.

She had a couple of passengers with her. Everyone said they were fine at the scene, but now I'm paranoid she's going to file an injury claim later and I'll have nothing to back up my side of the story.

I have her plate number (thankfully I thought to write it down before she left) and a general description of the car. That's it.

Is there anything I can do at this point? Should I call my insurance first or try to track down more info? I've never dealt with anything like this before and I genuinely don't know what my next move should be.

8replies

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8 replies

  • 12
    calm-vole-332

    A few practical steps that'll help regardless of where this goes:

    1. Write everything down right now — time, weather, exact location in the lot, what both of you said, what the officer said, who was present. 2. Take photos of your damage if you haven't already — even now, days later, it's better than nothing. 3. Check if the shopping center has cameras. Lots of those parking areas have security footage. If you can figure out who manages the property, you or your insurer might be able to request it before it gets overwritten.

    None of this is legal advice, just stuff that tends to matter later.

  • 10
    patient-vole-840

    I just want to say — you're being really hard on yourself and you don't need to be. You were shaken up, it was your first accident, and you still had the presence of mind to grab her plate. That matters. Take a breath. You have more to work with than you think.

  • 15
    bold-elk-729

    Call your insurance company today — not tomorrow, today. Report it yourself before she does. If she files first and you haven't reported it, that looks bad. Your insurer can actually run her plate and pull her policy info; that's literally part of what you pay them for. You did the right thing writing down the plate. Use it.

    • 9
      humble-marmot-205

      I went through almost the exact same thing in a grocery store lot a couple years back. Other driver refused to give me anything and I panicked. Ended up calling my insurance, they tracked down the other party through the plate number, and honestly it wasn't as catastrophic as I feared. The 'everyone said they're fine at the scene' thing actually does matter — document that you heard that, write it down somewhere with a timestamp right now while it's fresh.

    • 4
      clever-badger-226

      Heads up — 'everyone was fine at the scene' can flip really fast once attorneys get involved. Some people feel totally okay in the moment because adrenaline masks a lot, and then a week later they're at a chiropractor. I'm not saying she's shady, just... don't assume this is closed because nobody was limping when they drove away. Keep notes, keep records, don't post anything about this on your personal social media.

  • 13
    clear-badger-131

    On the injury side — if YOU feel any soreness, stiffness, or headaches in the next few days, please go get checked out. Soft tissue stuff doesn't always show up right away. I've seen people brush off a sore neck for a week and then realize it's actually a real problem. Getting it documented medically early protects you if there are any questions later about what the accident caused.

  • 5
    silent-lynx-424

    Not legal advice, but — the fact that no police report was filed doesn't mean you're without options or documentation. Your insurer's claim file becomes its own record. The plate number is genuinely useful. If an injury claim does come in later, your account of what was said at the scene (documented now, while your memory is sharp) carries real weight. Worth at least a free consult with a PI attorney if this escalates; most do them at no cost.

  • 3
    bright-swan-196

    Former insurance adjuster here. A few things — first, her refusing to give you her info doesn't actually protect her, it just made your night harder. Your carrier can locate her through the plate. Second, parking lot fault is almost never 100% on one party; the person in the through-lane still has some duty of care, so don't assume you're automatically fully liable just because you were merging. Third, report it to your own insurer before anything else. They've seen this scenario a thousand times.