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The Shoulder
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3 weeks out from a bad wreck and my brain won't let me forget it — anyone else?

Physically I'm doing okay-ish. Cracked a couple ribs, had some road rash on my arm, and I'm still dealing with headaches the doctors say are probably concussion-related. But honestly? The body stuff isn't what's keeping me up at night.

It's been almost a month and I cannot stop replaying the whole thing. I was riding shotgun when we got T-boned running through a green light — totally not our fault, other driver blew a stop sign. I remember seeing it coming and having zero time to do anything. Then just... chaos. Glass, noise, spinning. I think I was out for a second or two because there's a gap I can't account for.

Now every single time I'm in a car I'm scanning every intersection like a hawk. My hands literally grip whatever's near me. Last week a delivery truck backfired on the highway and I absolutely lost it — full-body flinch, probably scared my buddy who was driving half to death. He didn't say anything but I could tell.

I keep dreaming about it. Wake up at 3am with my heart pounding and then just lie there. During the day I'll be fine and then out of nowhere I can hear the impact again, clear as anything.

I know I should probably talk to someone. I've been putting it off because I'm dealing with the insurance stuff and the medical bills and it just feels like too much at once.

Did anyone else go through this kind of mental replay after their accident? Does it actually get better or am I just going to be a nervous wreck in cars forever? I don't want to make people around me feel like they're walking on eggshells.

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