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The Shoulder
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Almost 3 years post-crash and I'm still paying for what someone else did. I'm exhausted.

CW: grief, chronic illness, mental health, loss of independence

Just need to get this out somewhere because I feel like the people around me have moved on and I haven't.

Three years ago a driver blew through a red light at a busy intersection and hit me at highway speed. Total loss on my car. I walked away from the scene — or so I thought.

Before the crash I was thriving. I had a career I'd spent years building in hospitality management. I coached youth soccer on weekends. I was training for a half-marathon. I had a whole life.

Now? I have daily migraines that no specialist has been able to fully explain. I get vertigo so bad some mornings I can't get out of bed without gripping the nightstand. I've had two "episodes" that my neurologist thinks might be seizure-adjacent but we still don't have a clean diagnosis. I can't drive anymore — my reaction time and visual tracking are just... off. I had to leave my job because the screen time alone triggers migraines that knock me out for days.

My relationship didn't survive it. My friends don't really call anymore. I moved back in with family, which I'm grateful for, but I'm 34 years old and I feel like I'm watching my life through a window.

The other driver's insurance dragged things out so long I ended up accepting a settlement I'm not sure was fair just because I was too sick and too broke to keep fighting. And I still have medical bills coming in.

I don't really have a question. I just... needed someone to hear this. Does anyone else feel like the crash didn't just hurt you — it replaced you with someone you don't recognize?

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