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At-fault driver's insurance totaled my car but the offer feels wrong — do I fight it or go through mine?

I'm so overwhelmed right now and just need to hear from people who've been through something similar.

About three weeks ago someone ran a red light and slammed into us. Me, my sister, and her little one were all in the car. We're dealing with soreness, some whiplash stuff, and honestly just a lot of anxiety about getting back in a vehicle at all. The at-fault part isn't even in dispute — there's a police report and a witness.

Here's where I'm stuck:

The other driver's insurance came back with a total loss offer on my car. The number they gave me doesn't come close to covering what I still owe on the loan, and when I pushed back the rep basically told me the valuation is what it is and there's not much wiggle room. Now I'm upside down and without a vehicle, which is a nightmare because I use it for work.

On top of that they keep calling me — like multiple times a day — wanting me to sign and settle everything quickly. It feels really rushed and honestly a little pressured.

My questions:

  • Is it worth going through my own insurance instead and letting them fight the other carrier?
  • Can that total loss number actually be negotiated, or are they telling the truth that it's fixed?
  • Should I absolutely NOT sign anything right now?

I have a little bit of collision coverage on my own policy but I'm scared about paying a deductible when none of this was my fault. I just don't know which direction to do and I'm honestly losing sleep over it. Any advice from people who've dealt with this would mean a lot. 😔

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