My brother was killed by a driver and police have gone completely silent on us — what do we do?

I'm so deeply sorry. We lost a family member in a pedestrian accident two years ago and the police silence was one of the most maddening parts of the whole thing. What finally helped us was getting a wrongful death attorney involved — once they sent a formal letter of representation to the department, communication opened up almost immediately. Something about an attorney CC'd on things makes people respond faster. Hang in there, you are NOT failing your family.

Not legal advice, but — yes, wrongful death and personal injury often overlap and many PI attorneys handle both. A good one can send preservation letters to the property manager demanding that camera footage be held before it gets overwritten, which is genuinely time-sensitive. They can also communicate with the detective's department in ways that tend to get more traction than a grieving family member calling directly, unfortunately. Most offer free consultations. Please don't wait on the footage issue especially.

The camera footage thing the attorney above mentioned is urgent — commercial properties often recycle recordings on a 30-day loop, sometimes shorter. If it hasn't been formally requested or preserved yet, that clock is ticking. Also, you can request the accident/incident report directly from the department (usually through a records request) — that's public record in most states once it's been filed and may tell you more than the detective has. It's a small thing but it's something you can do right now.

Please be really careful if the at-fault driver's insurance company reaches out to anyone in your family. They may try to have conversations, get recorded statements, anything to limit what they eventually have to pay. Don't talk to them. Don't sign anything. Get an attorney first and let them handle all of that.

I used to work claims and I want to second what was just said above. Insurance companies open their own parallel investigations separate from the police — and they move fast. They are already building their picture of what happened. Your family deserves someone in your corner doing the same thing before positions get locked in. I saw too many cases where families waited and it cost them.

I just want to acknowledge that you're doing all of this while also grieving. That is an enormous amount to carry. Please make sure someone in your family is also checking in on your mom and on you. The logistical fight is important but so is not breaking down completely in the middle of it. Grief counselors who specialize in traumatic loss exist and they can help you function while all of this plays out.

I don't know anything about law or insurance but I just want to say I'm so sorry about your brother. The fact that you're out here trying to figure this out for your family shows how much you love him. Please don't be too hard on yourself.

Here's the short version of what I'd do in your position: (1) Call two or three wrongful death attorneys this week for free consults — not next month, this week. (2) Go back to that property manager in person and ask them in writing to preserve all footage. (3) File a formal public records request for the incident report. The police stonewalling families is unfortunately common but an attorney changes the dynamic fast.