My cousin died in a high-speed crash last month and our family has no idea what to do

I lost my brother in a crash two years ago. The honest truth is that the first few weeks you are just in survival mode and that's okay. The one thing I'd tell you is to write down everything you remember — what people have told you, any names, any details — before memories start to blur. You don't have to act on anything yet. Just document.

Not legal advice, but wrongful death claims are very time-sensitive because of statutes of limitations that vary by state. The fact that there may be surveillance footage is significant — that kind of evidence can disappear fast. If there's any way your family can consult with a personal injury attorney sooner rather than later, even just a free consultation, it's worth doing. Most PI attorneys work on contingency so there's no upfront cost. Again, not legal advice — just pointing out the clock is a real factor here.

Please, please make sure nobody in your family gives any recorded statements to any insurance company — not the driver's, not anyone's — before talking to an attorney. Adjusters will sometimes reach out to grieving families early and frame it as just "getting information to process the claim." It's not that simple. Anything said can be used to reduce what the family is owed.

I just want to say I'm so sorry. Grief after a sudden traumatic loss like this is its own kind of injury. Please don't forget that your cousin's mom — and you — may need mental health support through this. Trauma counseling is real medical care. Some attorneys who handle these cases can even connect families with grief resources as part of the process. Take care of the people, not just the paperwork.

I used to work on the claims side of things so let me tell you — the insurance company for the driver already has people working this file. They know the exposure is significant when there's a fatality involved. They are not sitting still. Your family shouldn't either. That doesn't mean rush into anything, but at minimum get an attorney who can send a preservation letter demanding that footage and any other evidence be held. That's one of the first things that should happen.

I'm so sorry about your cousin. You sound like you're holding so much right now — trying to be the strong one for the family while you're grieving too. That's exhausting. I hope you have someone looking out for you in all of this as well.

A couple of practical things that might help right now even before any attorney is involved: request a copy of the official police report (there's usually a small fee and a short wait), find out if any local news outlets covered the accident because they sometimes capture or reference surveillance footage, and if the injured passengers are willing, stay in contact with them — their accounts and records could matter later. Also, your cousin's medical and any emergency records from that night should be preserved. Family members with the right standing can often request those.

The grief is real and it comes first. But so does this: if the driver was at fault and your cousin was a passenger, your family likely has a wrongful death claim. Don't wait too long to talk to someone. Free consultations exist for a reason. You don't have to commit to anything — just get information while the evidence is still fresh.