gentle-marten-39610h ago

Other driver won't give me his full name — what do I do next?

So my wife got sideswiped last week and the other driver pulled over, seemed cooperative at first, then started acting really weird about sharing his information.

He handed her a piece of paper with just his insurance policy number and a phone number scribbled on it — no full name, no license number, nothing else. When I called him later he was friendly enough at first, told me to "just go through insurance" and that his carrier would handle everything. But the moment I asked for his full name he completely shut down. Said I had everything I needed and that he wasn't required to give me anything else.

I texted him asking again politely and he sent back this kind of passive-aggressive message saying I was harassing him and to stop contacting him. Then he stopped picking up entirely.

Here's the thing — the insurance paper he gave us doesn't actually have his name printed anywhere on it. Just a policy number and the carrier name.

On top of all this, we had my toddler's car seat in the back. Even though the impact was on the driver's side, I know the recommendation is to replace the seat after any crash. That's not a cheap thing and I want to make sure it's covered.

The police did come to the scene but I'm not sure if a formal report was filed or just an exchange-of-info call. I haven't reached back out to him since his last hostile text.

Has anyone dealt with someone being this cagey after an accident? What's my actual next move here? Do I go straight to his insurance with just a policy number, or do I need his name first?

9 replies

Most helpful first

hearty-tern-80410h ago
Almost the exact same thing happened to me — the other driver handed over the bare minimum and then went ghost. Honestly, the policy number is more useful than you might think. Call his insurance carrier directly, give them the policy number, describe the accident, and they can pull up the policy. They deal with situations like this all the time and they don't necessarily need you to give them the policyholder's name — they can look it up on their end.
- steady-mole-44210h ago
  Please don't let his insurance company bully you either. The same evasiveness you're getting from him might show up with his adjuster too — lowball offers, dragging their feet, suddenly claiming liability isn't clear. Get everything in writing. Don't accept the first offer they make. And definitely don't give them a recorded statement without knowing your rights first.
clever-marmot-95210h ago
Worked in claims for years. A policy number alone is genuinely enough to open a third-party claim with that carrier. When you call, just say you were involved in an accident with one of their policyholders, give the date, location, and that policy number. They will find the insured. His name will come out in the process whether he likes it or not.

Also — and I can't stress this enough — document everything right now. Screenshot every text, save every voicemail, write down the timeline of every call. You'll be glad you did.
genuine-beaver-95510h ago
The police report, even if it's just an exchange-of-info call, should still have a case or incident number attached. Go to the police department's records division and request a copy — it will have his full name, license number, and plate. That's your backup if the insurance route hits a snag. Shouldn't cost more than a few dollars to get a copy.
- gentle-bison-72410h ago
  Not legal advice, but just so you know — in most states drivers are legally required to exchange identifying information after an accident. Refusing to provide a full name could actually be a problem for him legally, separate from the civil claim. If the insurance route stalls or gets complicated, that's something worth mentioning to an attorney. Many do free consultations for exactly this kind of situation.
bright-heron-83610h ago
Just want to flag — even if your wife feels fine right now, some injuries from side-impact crashes don't show up immediately. Soft tissue stuff especially. If she hasn't seen a doctor yet, please go. Not just for her health but because having a medical record tied to the accident date protects you if something shows up later and you need to connect it back to the crash.
warm-swan-91310h ago
Stop texting him. He's already threatened to call it harassment and that word can be used against you. You have what you need — policy number, date, your own photos from the scene I hope. Call the insurance company, open the claim, let the process do its thing. Don't give this guy any more rope to grab onto.
cool-dove-51710h ago
The fact that he shut down the moment you asked for his name is such a red flag. Like why would a person acting in good faith refuse that? I really hope you get this sorted out — it's so stressful dealing with someone who's clearly trying to dodge accountability when your family was the one affected.
kind-wolf-06010h ago
The good news is you're in a better spot than you feel right now. You have a policy number, you have the carrier name, and by the sounds of it the other driver already acknowledged the accident happened. That's actually a solid foundation to work from. Hang in there — this is frustrating but it's workable.