sharp-otter-4114/15/2026

Update: fault decision came back and honestly I have mixed feelings about it

Hey everyone — a few weeks ago I posted here asking whether people thought I shared any blame for a collision I was in. Got a ton of different opinions, which I appreciated even when they stung a little.

Well, the liability decision finally came through. The other driver was found fully at fault. My dashcam footage plus the officer's statement apparently sealed it.

Here's the thing though… I'm relieved, obviously. But I'm also sitting with some guilt I didn't expect. Like yes, he made the move that caused the crash. But if I had been paying closer attention, reacted a half second sooner, maybe I could've avoided the whole thing. I don't know. Feels weird to walk away "clean" when I keep replaying it and seeing the moment where I could've done something different.

I'm not going to dispute the decision — that would be shooting myself in the foot — but I just want to be honest that I don't think real life fits neatly into 0% and 100% boxes.

Still dealing with some neck stiffness and my car isn't fully sorted yet, so it's not over. But fault-wise, at least that chapter is closed.

Anyone else ever felt guilty after being found not at fault? Is that a normal response or am I just being too hard on myself? 🤷

8 replies

Most helpful first

kind-kestrel-2574/17/2026
Honestly? I felt the exact same way after my accident. I was rear-ended at a light and found zero percent at fault, but I kept thinking 'what if I had pulled up a little further' or 'what if I had left five seconds earlier.' It's just your brain trying to find control in a situation that was genuinely out of your hands. It fades.
cool-dove-3704/17/2026
That guilt response is actually really common after traumatic events — your brain is doing something called counterfactual thinking, basically running 'what if' simulations. It can feel like moral responsibility but it's more of a coping mechanism. Please don't let it fester. If it's keeping you up at night or you're constantly replaying the crash, it might be worth talking to someone, even just once. Also — stay on top of that neck stiffness. 'A little sore' has a way of becoming something more significant weeks later if it's not documented and treated properly.
cool-badger-5514/18/2026
Glad the fault decision went your way, but keep your guard up. A 100% fault finding on the other driver doesn't mean his insurance is going to make your life easy from here. They'll still try to drag out the process, lowball your vehicle damage, and act like your injury symptoms aren't that serious. Stay organized, keep every receipt, and don't let them pressure you into settling before you actually know how that neck is going to heal.
- sharp-beaver-9214/18/2026
  You weren't found at fault. That's the outcome. Stop relitigating it in your own head — the system looked at the evidence and made a call. What you should be focused on right now is your neck and getting your car situation fully resolved before you sign anything.
bold-kestrel-9844/18/2026
The dashcam footage was probably the single biggest factor here. I used to work on the claims side and I cannot stress enough how much video changes outcomes — adjusters have a lot more room to argue fault percentages when it's just one person's word against another's. You basically took that argument off the table. Smart that you didn't fight the decision either. People underestimate how much disputing a favorable ruling can backfire.
- daring-marten-3224/20/2026
  The fact that you're reflecting on what you could have done differently actually makes you a better driver going forward. Most people either get defensive or just move on without processing it at all. You're going to be so much more aware behind the wheel now — that's genuinely valuable.
hearty-elk-3524/20/2026
Just a heads up on the neck stiffness — the liability decision being settled doesn't mean you need to rush the injury side of things. A lot of people feel pressure to wrap everything up at once, but soft tissue injuries in particular can take weeks to fully declare themselves. If there's any chance you'll be making a bodily injury claim, make sure you've actually finished treatment (or have a clear picture of what treatment you need) before agreeing to any final numbers. Once you sign a release, that's it.
bright-grouse-3594/20/2026
I'm so glad it worked out in your favor, truly. But please take care of that neck. I had a friend who brushed off soreness after a fender bender and ended up dealing with it for over a year. Don't tough it out — go get it properly checked if you haven't already. 💙